I would like to hurt you and hurt you bad but I
am too man for that. I would like to be mean, really mean but I am too man for
that either…I suppose.
I would like to do so many nasty things to you
but my momma taught me better or was it an aunt…well it’s something I learnt.
I would like to spread rumours about and see
the horror on your face when someone tells you but nah…I am way too good for
that.
There is so much I would like to do to you gal
but there is much more on the inside that stops me. Besides it goes against my
grain to invest that much in something that has caused me so much pain.
Yes, I admit it, you have caused me pain. But I
guess that means I am alive, or so I am told.
A friend told me today that true Satanism is
not worshipping the devil or listening to hard core rock music, its simply
giving in and fulfilling the desires of the flesh and I don’t want to be no Satanist
so I shan’t do all the things I think of doing.
Instead I shall go to the one place I can truly
be naked and unashamed and that is to God. Being so old, ancient of days and
all, sometimes I wonder if he hears me but I know He makes me feel better and less afraid
and angry and bitter and hopeless than most.
I guess he is truly a friend that sticks closer
than a brother. To His bosom I entrust my tears and fears. He shall rescue me.
Other Random Thoughts
Redefine friendships.
i am afraid of the dark side of my soul.
haaa! women. who said we cant live without them.
