Wednesday, February 8, 2012

Suicide Note


PUSHING BACK THE SUICIDAL THOUGHTS, RACING TO THE TOP SEARCHING FOR ONE LAST BREATH THE CURTAINS OF DARKNESS SWING BACK I STUMBLE BREAK THROUGH...THERE IS NOTHING THEIR ONLY THIN AIR...FALLING, FALLING,  FALLING

Even I cannot keep up with my dark thought. Breaking through the glass, shards flying everywhere ironically my hands shield my face from the pieces of sharp glass daggers, as if that will make a difference when I strike the floor with terminal velocity.

Black and white Converse “all stars” adorns my feet. White laces dangle loose in the crisp morning air. I am pretty stylish an unlikely bird that I am today. Everyone must dress to meet their maker you see. Dark blue jeans with the light fade, gray sweater with the wolf teeth design, pink white and grey I believe with my starched whites underneath.

A billions bits of light reflect in the glass as my hair, bronzed by the back lit sun, hallo my head. Falling, falling, falling.

It’s all pretty surreal to me now. Walking the long flight of steps, standing in the hallway, the deep breath and then the slow building run and then the massive thigh thrust lunge through the glass. My swan dive had begun. Where it will end we shall soon began.